An amicable divorce is a noble goal, but it's also a difficult one. Ending a relationship is often emotionally fraught; add to that the legal complexity of divorce, and you can see why amicable divorces are not more common. But when they are possible, they have a host of benefits. They are generally faster and less stressful than adversarial divorces, and they are less expensive as well. So is an amicable divorce right for you?
Amicable Divorce Doesn't Have To Mean Friendly
One misconception about amicable divorces is that you need to be friendly with your soon-to-be-ex-spouse in order to pursue one. In fact, it's better to think of it the other way around: amicable divorce is difficult if you're angry or one or the other participant feels mistreated. It's certainly possible, however, to get an amicable divorce even if the divorce is upsetting and you and your spouse disagree on some issues – as long as you can deal with those issues openly and honestly and not allow the fact that you're upset to get in the way.
Honest Communication Is Essential
The most important key to a successful amicable divorce is open and honest communication between the two parties. Although it's possible for a divorce to be settled with no disagreement, it's rare – but where there is disagreement, trust is crucial. If both spouses know what they want out of the divorce as well as what the other spouse wants, negotiation can proceed from that point and compromises can be worked out.
Balance Of Power Is Important
One thing that can make amicable divorce difficult is an imbalance of power. The easiest example of this is financial; if one spouse works at a high-paying job and the other spouse has been a homemaker, there's an imbalance between them. It's easy for the less "powerful" partner to feel pressured to accept terms they are uncomfortable with, and it's more difficult for them to be honest in the divorce proceedings.
While the financial version is the most obvious, emotional imbalance is more important. If two spouses are financially unbalanced but have no problem being open with each other, it is not necessarily a problem. If one spouse feels very guilty about the divorce and the other doesn't, for example, that has a much bigger effect on the negotiations. The most extreme example of this is in situations of abuse, whether physical or emotional; amicable divorce is not a good idea in these cases as the emotional balance of power is much too complex and potentially harmful.
A Lawyer Is Still Important
One of the ways that an amicable divorce can save money is on legal fees. That doesn't mean you should skip hiring a lawyer completely; however, in an amicable divorce, it's not necessary for each spouse to have a separate lawyer. Instead, a single lawyer can walk them through the legal process as well as the negotiations of the terms of the divorce. To eliminate any hint of bias, one spouse can then have a different divorce lawyer check over the finalized agreement before signing it; this is still much less expensive than hiring two lawyers for a court battle.
Share31 July 2015
Like many other people, I admire the important tasks lawyers take on every day. I’m amazed at how knowledgeable general attorneys are about a variety of subjects. These professionals can accomplish many complicated jobs seamlessly, such as representing a client in a civil lawsuit, assisting a business with a merger, and acting on a client’s behalf in a medical malpractice lawsuit. Besides creating detailed legal briefs, they must argue their clients’ cases in court in front of a judge, jurors, and others. On this blog, I hope you will discover how crucial general attorneys are to this country’s legal system.